Sharing a pew with a repugnant cultural other

[E]xtra degrees of charity and empathy are necessary in public discussion and debate. At the moment, what we have instead are extra degrees of anger and contempt. David French

This quote is from an article by David French at National Review on the gun control debate that is raging after the  school shooting in Florida last week. He writes that if we cannot stop demonizing one another, this could tear our nation apart. I agree. The animosity towards one's opposing side has only grown since the 2016 election. I've seen this on social media in general and among those who profess Christ's name, which grieves me even more.

Does strong disagreement justify this behavior? Would we use the same language and attitude toward a fellow Christian face-to-face as we would to a stranger on Twitter? If this is a fellow believer, we are called to love them as someone for whom Christ has died. For the unbeliever, he/she is our neighbor. If we won't acknowledge that, we are called to love our enemies. There's no getting around this call to love. To paraphrase the Apostle Paul, if I have the solution to all of America's societal ills but act like an arrogant and disrespectful know-it-all, I am nothing but a clanging cymbal.

What if we are in the same church, sharing the same pew and you are my repugnant cultural other (RCO) and I am yours? Does this give me the right to hold you in contempt? Or should I just exit and find another church free from the types of people that irk me on these secondary issues? But then what does that say about the local church? Is it a place where we gather to worship God and receive the ordinary means of grace because of the gospel plus our consensus on the latest hot-button issue?

Or is the solution a moratorium on discussing possible triggers? There's nothing wrong with tact, but long-term avoidance probably isn't healthy. An outward smile that masks even the smallest hairline cracks of fear and distrust can weaken the foundation of community. The elephants in the room will only grow larger and become more awkward  to tiptoe around if they remain unaddressed.

Perhaps our unity and love need testing to make them stronger. Will you bear with me and still love me as your sister in Christ if you find out that I disagree with you on politics and social justice issues? Will I do the same for you? Will we learn to listen to one another and try to understand where the other is coming from even if we find ourselves on opposing sides in the end? Will we respect one another, trusting that only God can ultimately change hearts and minds, instead of pressuring, cajoling, or shaming one another into agreement? Or will we write one another off?

I examined myself to find out who is my RCO, and what I saw cut me to the heart. If I chose to lump people into broad categories based on uninformed assumptions, I could potentially reject brothers and sisters whom I love. I do not want to go down the path of animus. I do not want to sin against God and the Body of Christ, but this will require commitment on my part to love and understand when it would be easier to not bother trying. The stakes are higher than just being nice and politically correct. This is about preserving the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. This is a plea that we would be known for our humility, gentleness, and patience rather than our disparaging words and reluctance to listen. (Eph. 4:1-3)

In John 17:20-21, Jesus prays:

I do not ask on behalf of these alone, but for those also who believe in Me through their word; that they may all be one; even as You, Father, are in Me and I in You, that they also may be in Us, so that the world may believe that You sent Me.

If there ever was a time that we need our Great High Priest to intercede for us in this way, it is now.