Tried With Fire

I am slowly working my way through Forbearance: A Theological Ethic for a Disagreeable Church . This is such a good book about a very difficult subject. I would probably disagree with the author about quite a number of doctrinal points, but his book has challenged me in how I handle those disagreement. I have every reason to believe he is a brother in Christ and that we agree on how one becomes a Christian. So the question is how willing an I learn from him or another brother or sister in Christ whom I disagree with? And in real life, there's an additional question - how willing am I to invest in that relationship? In our families, we have to deal with disagreements all the time. No one expects perfect harmony between spouses, siblings, or parents and children. That's just being realistic regarding human nature and the process of sanctification. But those disagreements must be talked out for there to be peace and because we love one another . So for the sake of fighting ...

Listening is one of those things we take for granted and think we do well. But it's more than taking in speech through our ears. The point may not even be fixing a problem that is being presented. It's actually a setting aside of one's self and taking the time to be there for another person. 1 When I realized I needed to see a counselor several years ago, I assumed that she would tell me what to do, but she didn't. She gave me a safe and neutral space to unburden things I have never told another soul. She really didn't give much advice at all, but the blessing of having someone who actually listened to me and didn't offer platitudes or advice off the cuff enabled me to see my way more clearly than before. Having a listening ear was important when working through my issues, but I think it is a basic human need. But to listen well requires patience which seems to be a lost virtue. Given our consumer mindset, we can tailor our lives to cater to our interests ...