Domestic abuse is an imago dei issue - a repost

In the light of the controversy surrounding Paige Patterson and his comments on abuse and women, I am sharing this slightly edited post from 2014 that I wrote for domestic violence awareness month. 

It's funny how the things we care about the most are often the most painful and emotionally exhausting to put into words. How do you encapsulate an issue that touches theology, history, and culture? How do you write about something so personal and not dredge up memories and feelings that you'd rather consign to oblivion? I wrote drafts that are probably too volatile to be published because they tipped a few sacred cows that we cling to as conservative Christians. It helped to get those thoughts out of my head, but I'm still frustrated at the huge blind spot that the evangelical church seems to have - a sort of hear no evil, see no evil, speak no evil about domestic abuse within its walls.

After much research, thinking, and praying, I am convinced that domestic violence is an imago dei issue. It is not a gender issue or about getting our "roles" right. If men and women are equally made in the image of God, then both deserve honor and respect as His image-bearers. If the Gospel is applicable to both men and women, then both have equal standing before God because of Christ's merit. But in direct opposition, abuse takes place when one human being attempts to gain power and control over another human being through whatever means achieve that result. This is nothing more than an attempt to be "God" over another image-bearer. And this is why all forms of abuse, physical and nonphysical, are evil irrespective of gender. It is God's prerogative alone to exercise His rule over every aspect of creation because He is Creator. He will never misuse His authority because He is without sin. He will never mistreat His own because He is the God of love as well as the God of justice and holiness. And lest we forget, Jesus explicitly said,

"You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their great ones exercise authority over them. It shall not be so among you. But whoever would be great among you must be your servant, and whoever would be first among you must be your slave, even as the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.” Matt. 20:25-28.

Likewise when it comes to confronting abuse, there should be no respecter of persons. There should be no allowances made and immunity given to excuse this sort of behavior. To do so is to admit that the victims are not on an equal footing when it comes their humanity or the dignity with which they should be treated. To do so is siding with the abuser and providing cover for continued abuse. To do so contradicts Scripture.

“You have heard that it was said to those of old, ‘You shall not murder; and whoever murders will be liable to judgment.’ But I say to you that everyone who is angry with his brother will be liable to judgment; whoever insults his brother will be liable to the council; and whoever says, ‘You fool!’ will be liable to the hell of fire. Matthew 5:21-22

If you really fulfill the royal law according to the Scripture, “You shall love your neighbor as yourself,” you are doing well.  But if you show partiality, you are committing sin and are convicted by the law as transgressors. James 2:8-9

For every kind of beast and bird, of reptile and sea creature, can be tamed and has been tamed by mankind, but no human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison. With it we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse people who are made in the likeness of God. From the same mouth come blessing and cursing. My brothers, these things ought not to be so. James 3:7-10

If anyone says, “I love God,” and hates his brother, he is a liar; for he who does not love his brother whom he has seen cannot love God whom he has not seen.  And this commandment we have from him: whoever loves God must also love his brother. 1 John 4:20-21

Even though these verses apply to relationships between human beings, doesn't marriage and family fall within their scope? If this is the case, would anyone like to say that role or gender exempts a person from being held accountable to God's Word?  Would anyone like to say that role or gender denies a person basic human dignity? Any takers?

No human being has the right to abuse another person made in the image of God. No exceptions. No excuses. Period.

So I pray that the church-at-large would:

- Repent of where it has sided with the abuser and learn from its mistakes.

- Recognize domestic abuse in all its forms and refuse to harbor it within its walls. 

- Pursue justice on behalf of the victims. 

- Be a place of safety and healing for the victims.

- Take a stand and declare, "My brothers, these things ought not to be so."