Tried With Fire

Our new house isn't very architecturally interesting.  It's just one of the thousands of brick ranchers that were built in the early '60s, but we think it deserves its own name. Casa Calvin? Chez Calvinist? Maison Manton? Puritan Pad?    I proposed  Dordt House which was immediately vetoed by my daughter as being too strange.  I then suggested Reformation Ranch , but she said it sounded like a Calvinist salad dressing (made with only 5 ingredients!)   Dead Guys' Bungalow?   The name sounds like the title of a Nancy Drew mystery.   Tulip Ranch ?  But we have no tulips until we plant some in the fall.  Also when I think of ranch , cattle come to mind, so I have a mental image of herds of black and white spotted tulips mooing and grazing on the prairie. But after some deliberation, we have chosen  Providence House . In the last three years, my eyes were opened to God's providence and sovereignty.  I'm still learning t...

God has engaged himself, having chosen a people for himself, and secured them from all that any can do against them.  Election is as eternal as God is, without variableness or shadow of change, and thus is called 'an eternal purpose', and it must stand.  It is absolute and unconditional.  No works were foreseen in us that were the cause of God's choosing us; and no sin in us shall frustrate or make election void.  By the act of election, we are wrapped and covered in Christ; he has chosen us in him; not in ourselves, not in our virtues, no, not for or because of anything but his own will. from Works , 1: 163-164

I am thankful for: A "new" lawn mower.  Now that we've moved, we needed a small mower for our little yard.  Our friends had a gently-used gas mower offered to them, and they, in turn, passed it onto us.  It probably looked funny as my daughter braced the mower while I pulled the starter.  (Maybe I need to start lifting weights?)  Once we got it started, it did a great job.  All that's left are spraying a few weeds, putting down mulch, and maybe planting a few annuals. Church softball games.  It has been fun to root for the team and get to know folks in an informal setting.  Even though we lost tonight, we had a great comeback with 8 runs including a 2-run homer. A fresh reminder of God's sovereignty in all things.  As we reflected on Acts 21-24 at small group last night, someone mentioned that Paul viewed his persecution as an opportunity to declare the Gospel rather than something to be avoided.  This was such a help to me.  ...

Sufferings have obtained an ill name in the world, but God's rod and love may stand together.  God teaches his people in affliction. God works his children into a sweet, obedient frame.  At length, God brings his children to subscribe: "What God wills, when God wills, how God wills; your will be done on earth as it is in heaven." Thomas Case (1598-1682), Select Works, A Treatise of Afflictions , pp. 5-27, from Voices From the Past , page 145, Banner of Truth.

I'm not a rugged individualist.  My individualism is more of a stealth variety. Outwardly it may appear that I am quite open, but I'm the one who knows to what extent.  The degree of openness is on my terms. It may not even be consciously done, but I weigh carefully how much I reveal of myself. In fact, that is why blogging is so appealing. If I wanted to, I could come up with a completely phony persona, and no one would know the difference.  And even if I'm not lying about who I am (which I'm not) there is a degree of safety in lack of personal contact. But this individualism can stand in the way of fellowship. There is a greater closeness with people in the church for which I am grateful, but deep down inside I still want to maintain a certain level of distance.  I like having my personal space.  One little example is my preference for email over the phone in contacting people.  Why?  Because it's more impersonal.  You are in control over the ...

My daughter and I get to spend an hour or so in the car when I drop her off for week-end visitation.  We often listen to music or sermons or just talk.  One thing we discussed was conviction and repentance.  A few years ago, she came under conviction and was in tears confessing and repenting for a past sin.  She never forgot that instance and never forgot to be encouraged when convicted because conviction leading to repentance is evidence of the work of the Holy Spirit. This was a good reminder for me today.  I have my moments like the Psalmist who looked at the wicked flourishing and wondered why they can breeze through life with nary a pang or at least easily suppress any pangs.  I confess I am still waiting for lightning to fall from heaven and nothing has happened.  But I am reminded of the sobering words of Thomas Brooks, " God is most angry when he shows no anger. God keep me from this mercy; this kind of mercy is worse than all other kind of...

This little guy (or gal) outside our window inspired this all squirrel edition of Follies and Nonsense.

I am thankful for: A sunny day.  We had three days of rain at the beginning of the week, so those golden rays were especially welcome. The freedom to homeschool.  It has been a joy to teach my daughter.  I'm also thankful for her test scores which we received this week. However, homeschooling has been more than academics.  It has also afforded us the opportunity to work on spiritual discipline and self-control and to anchor our view of life, culture, and history on God's Word.  Our lengthy theological discussions have been good for us both.  I know this is not for everyone and should be a matter of Christian liberty.  However in our situation, it has been a great blessing. On a bittersweet note, my aunt went home to be with the Lord.  At the end, she clearly said that she wanted to go to her Heavenly Father's house.  She is free from her cancer and enjoying the presence of God.  I pray for God's comfort to support my uncle and cous...

Every age has its own outlook. It is specially good at seeing certain truths and specially liable to make certain mistakes. We all, therefore, need the books that will correct the characteristic mistakes of our own period. And that means the old books. All contemporary writers share to some extent the contemporary outlook—even those, like myself, who seem most opposed to it. Nothing strikes me more when I read the controversies of past ages than the fact that both sides were usually assuming without question a good deal which we should now absolutely deny. They thought that they were as completely opposed as two sides could be, but in fact they were all the time secretly united—united with each other and against earlier and later ages—by a great mass of common assumptions. We may be sure that the characteristic blindness of the twentieth century—the blindness about which posterity will ask, "But how could they have thought that?"—lies where we have never suspected it, and co...

When Christians let fall their heavenly expectations but heighten their earthly desires, they are preparing themselves for fear and trouble.  Who has met with a distressed, complaining soul, where either a low expectation of heavenly blessings, or too high a hope for joy on earth is not present?   What keeps us under trouble is either we do not expect what God has promised, or we expect what he did not promise.  We are grieved at crosses, losses, wrongs of our enemies, unkind dealings of our friends, sickness, or for contempt and scorn in the world.  But who encouraged you to expect better?  Was it prosperity, riches, credit, and friends that God called for you to believe?  Do you have any promises for these things in his Word?  If you make a promise to yourself, and then your own promise deceives you, whom should you blame for that?  We have less comfort in earthly things because we have too high an expectation from them.  Alas, when will w...

Location is everything - especially when your car breaks down.  The two best places would be either your own driveway or your mechanic's parking lot.  Providence chose the driveway for me.  My car finally refused to start after several months of erratic and fitful starts.  I can think of numerous places where the car could have died leaving me stranded.  God also provided a brother in the church with a towing thingamajig.  After much maneuvering and pushing by him and the pastor, the car was safely towed to the repair shop to be fixed.  This may be a small mercy, but it is a mercy for which I am very thankful.

In today's sermon, Pastor Ryan challenged us to consider what priority the local church has in our lives.   Can we honestly say we love Him and don't love the Bride that He purchased with His own blood?  If so, maybe our love for Him needs to be examined. I was sharply reminded how I used to be of that mindset.  I loved Jesus, but had no use for the church visible since the invisible universal church was more important than any sort of visible manifestation.  We had excuses and what we thought were "spiritual" justifications, but we was in error and disobeying what is clear in Scripture.  Not only was I going astray, but I was indoctrinating my daughter as well.  In the unpacking process, I ran across a children's book on prayer.  I had  crossed out the phrase  "We can pray to God when we go to church on Sunday ." In its place, I wrote "every day."  Yes, we can pray to Him every day but to deliberately omit any reference to the Church?...

Well, I have my Mac back, but minus the data. The repair shop had thought it could be retrieved, but to no avail. When I spoke with the tech, he said the disk couldn't even read the data at all and every time the drive would click, more data would be destroyed.  This makes me wonder if the drive head was bouncing on the platter, gouging out chunks of data. I had thought I had backed up some of the data, but when I put in the media, the computer tells me it is blank. I may pursue it further or just let it go.  After all, God was sovereign over the placement of every 0 and 1 on that drive and the timing of the crash. I did lose two novelettes written for NaNoWriMo in 2005 & 2006. But I was such a different person then. I wrote to find a little escape from the sad reality of what was happening to my marriage. The stories were very light and humorous, perhaps to counter the heaviness in my heart. Maybe, I will rewrite them some day, maybe not. I may have a better i...

ht: daily bunny

T4G 2010 -- Session 8 -- Matt Chandler from Together for the Gospel (T4G) on Vimeo . (If you don't have time to watch the whole video, please watch from 18:00 - 21:00.)

We awoke this morning to find that Rusty, the guinea pig, had died in his sleep. We had taken him to the vet last week because his appetite was steadily decreasing each day and to check for an upper respiratory infection. After a thorough exam and administering subcutaneous fluids, there wasn't much the vet could do except blood work. Even if we did the blood tests and found that one of his organ systems was failing, there are very little treatment options, if any, for small mammals. We knew it was only a matter of time before either Rusty would die, we would have to force feed him, or put him to sleep if he was slowly staving himself to death. I am thankful he died naturally according to God's sovereign timing. Although Rusty was eating less and less, he did not appear to be in any pain. So our pet population is down to the two rabbits. Lizzy is 7, and Big Bun is 5, which is the youngest estimate for their ages. Bunnies live 8-10 years so we may have them for a while....

Are not in their little paws or our hands but subject to God's will. I came down with a cold last night and developed a fever today. We were planning on attending the Titus 2 meeting tonight, ladies Bible study tomorrow, and helping out some of the senior saints in the church tomorrow evening. I'm praying that I will feel better by tomorrow, but I'm glad that I can trust God's sovereignty over the intersection of the common cold virus, my respiratory and immune system, and what He has ordained for tomorrow. I don't like being sick, but I definitely prefer being sick as a Calvinist.

We are getting acquainted with our new yard. The previous owner planted several roses. They're beautiful to look at, but they have no scent. Not even a faint whiff of anything remotely like a rose. My preference would be to have them look less perfect and smell more like roses. I think there may be a spiritual analogy here. One can look so good on the outside but when you get up close, there may be no fragrance of Christ at all. It's all just for show. I have been playing plant detective. There is a vine growing near one of the roses. The leaves look almost like wild grape leaves but not quite. I have checked Virginia Tech's dendrology site, but to no avail. If anyone recognizes this, let me know. I have also checked if it was a squash, cucumber, melon volunteer or even an ornamental bean like scarlet runner or hyacinth bean. I got word that my Mac is salvageable for a price. The mother board and the hard drive went bad and need to be replaced. However, the d...

We had a relatively uneventful Mother's Day. Although the pastor prayed for the moms in the congregation, the sermon was on the sacraments of baptism and the Lord's supper. We didn't go to a restaurant today because of the crowds. My daughter didn't make me a card, because we have no idea where we packed the card stock. This didn't bother me. There were years when I felt my level of worth was based on the presents, cards, or flowers. But in reality, that insecurity may have been a hidden desire to be made much of. Having gone through divorce and inevitable custody issues, cards and flowers are of little value compared to my child. I 'm thankful to have her with me and grateful to be her mom. She is more important than the most elaborate card that she could ever make. I did send my mom a card. She would forget her own birthday unless she was reminded. I love my mom very much. I'm thankful that our relationship is first and foremost in Christ. We m...

Life can be so much less stressful if you believe in the sovereignty of God. When unexpected things occur, they weren't unexpected to Him, and there is a purpose in all that takes place. As I was listening to Matt Chandler's session from T4G last night, he said that Christians often believe in Karma rather than an all sovereign God. I can attest to that having been an expert in that mindset. When something untoward would happen, my first reaction would be, "Oh no!" I was unaware that I was infecting my daughter with this same fear until one day many, many moons ago, the toilet got clogged. My daughter blurted out, " Oh no! We'll never be able to use the toilet again! " OUCH! I'm thankful for that reality check. Thankfully, God has brought us through a season where we've had to come to grips with His sovereignty, even over painful events. I still have my moments, but the lessons I've learned have made such a difference in trusting H...

I received word this evening that my aunt may only have a few days to live. She was diagnosed with cancer of the pleural cavity and was undergoing chemo. She took a turn for the worse yesterday and was hospitalized. The doctors discovered her right lung was not functioning, and her system was toxic with carbon dioxide. My aunt and uncle are believers as well as their children. In speaking with my sister, she said to pray that it would not be too soon, meaning my aunt's death, and to pray that God would be in control. Lest I point the finger, I was that way for most of my life - having a morbid uncertainty whether events were God's will or not. But I gently said to her that God numbers our days. It will not be too soon or too late. He is in control, even over the spread of our aunt's cancer. But after I hung up, I had to ask myself would I feel this way if it was my mom who was dying? Or my daughter? Or myself? Would I be secure in God's sovereign plan, knowing that noth...

But what if the foreknowledge of God and the liberty of the will cannot be fully reconciled fully by man? Shall we therefore deny a perfection in God to support a liberty in ourselves? Shall we rather fasten ignorance upon God and accuse Him of blindness to maintain our liberty? Stephen Charnock (1628-1680) from Discourses Upon the Existence and Attributes of God (Thanks to Martin Downes who gave this great quote by Charnock in his talk Heresy Never Dies .)

"I have been acquainted somewhat with men and books, and have long experience in learning and in the world; there is no book like the Bible for excellence, learning, wisdom, and use; and it is want of understanding in them that think or speak otherwise." Sir Matthew Hale (1600-1675) from Words Old & New , pg. 160, Banner of Truth.

This afternoon my daughter unpacked the theology books, so here is our modest collection: I did point out to her that we still have room on the shelf. Perhaps for a few more? But as much as I love books, nothing can take the place of the Word of God as the foundation for our lives, as we were reminded in today's sermon. These are only a supplement. The Word is the main diet.

These all died in faith, not having received the things promised, but having seen them and greeted them from afar, and having acknowledged that they were strangers and exiles on the earth. Hebrews 11:13 This was a good verse to ponder while unpacking our earthly belongings. It is such a relief to be done with the move and to unpack rather than pack. But I'm also aware that this house and this earth is not my permanent home. It's easy to say that my citizenship is in heaven, but still be so tied to this world that I don't want to leave it. So as we begin to make this house a home, as pleasant as that is, I pray that my heart would be find its permanent address in Christ alone.