UPDATE: Here's the followup article from World. I like how they stress the importance of the local church as a necessary source of help and counsel on this issue.
Has anyone read the World magazine article, Boy Meets Girl?
As a mom of a teen girl, the topics of dating, courtship, and marriage have been the subjects of some very healthy conversations. I do not advocate casual dating that's "I find you attractive with no more thought than the moment, so let's get involved, potentially physically, and put ourselves in the way of sexual temptation." Neither do I endorse "Everyone else is dating, so I should do it or else I will look like a complete loser."
Yet reading the article, it seems that the courtship model has it's own drawbacks particularly the pressure of all or nothing -- going from being completely uninvolved to being virtually engaged. It makes me wonder how much of this paradigm is based on the myth of The One?
Since I Kissed Dating Good-bye by Joshua Harris is apparently a major influence for many Christian youth, I'm finally going to read it but not with rose-colored glasses. I also wonder, is there a way other than casual dating or idealized, hyper-spiritualized courtship? Maybe it's Kevin DeYoung's advice in Just Do Something.
Has anyone read the World magazine article, Boy Meets Girl?
As a mom of a teen girl, the topics of dating, courtship, and marriage have been the subjects of some very healthy conversations. I do not advocate casual dating that's "I find you attractive with no more thought than the moment, so let's get involved, potentially physically, and put ourselves in the way of sexual temptation." Neither do I endorse "Everyone else is dating, so I should do it or else I will look like a complete loser."
Yet reading the article, it seems that the courtship model has it's own drawbacks particularly the pressure of all or nothing -- going from being completely uninvolved to being virtually engaged. It makes me wonder how much of this paradigm is based on the myth of The One?
Since I Kissed Dating Good-bye by Joshua Harris is apparently a major influence for many Christian youth, I'm finally going to read it but not with rose-colored glasses. I also wonder, is there a way other than casual dating or idealized, hyper-spiritualized courtship? Maybe it's Kevin DeYoung's advice in Just Do Something.
Perhaps the old "chaperone" routine. It seems to me that the common experience of most (nearly all) dating couples is that sex enters the picture almost immediately. Regardless of age.
ReplyDeleteWisdom. If only we could give our children our age-learned wisdom.
White Stone- wonderful comment. I had 4 teens at one time, and it is not easy. I pray often...
ReplyDeleteChaperoning has worked but the world and its ways are a tremendous pull. Daily effort is necessary and complete faith in Him as we cannot do anything without Him.
Hi! I have been following your blog for a while, and this post intrigued me. :D
ReplyDeleteI had heard one person say that they wished to just be friends with that person and their family and meet in family-oriented settings. After becoming good friends you would decide he or she is the "one" and you would just pop the question. Although I don't agree completely with the idea, I do like the first bit of just learning more about that person in family settings before you move further into "courtship" or "dating". I don't know. I agree with White Stone. Just tons of Wisdom and prayer!
I won't ever have to deal with this as my children will all have no interest in dating until they are in their mid twenties and then will all find perfect match-made-in-heaven Christian spouses and will live happily ever after and give me lots of grandbabies...
ReplyDelete:)
Great topic Persis,
I don't know how in the world I'm going to handle this...my teen years were a DISASTER, and I'm a scared!
@Ma:
ReplyDeleteLOL!