Tried With Fire

God has provided us with a house. It went on the market the very week we got our contract. It's a small brick rancher in great condition with a nice little yard. The house is only one year older than me, so it's not old at all. :-) The neighborhood seems very pleasant and quiet, and it's even closer to the church than where we are currently living. I am in awe of the timing of the events, because everything has unfolded in less than 2 weeks. A dear friend told me that she didn't expect our house to sell until our next home would be available. This house wasn't even on our list of potential homes. We looked at the house next door, which is also for sale, and noticed that this one was vacant. I liked it from the moment we walked through the door. Coincidentally or rather providentially, my realtor and the seller's agent go to the same church. The previous owner was a member of that same Baptist church. It's a small world. It's also nice knowing that we may...

God is so good to bless the preaching of His Word. Dr. Haykin spoke powerfully on praying in the Spirit from Jude and love as the fruit of the Spirit from 1 John 3-4 today. The audio is available here for listening or download. Dr. Haykin graciously gave 3 book recommendations on the Holy Spirit: 1. Keep in Step with the Spirit by J.I. Packer 2. The Holy Spirit by Sinclair Ferguson 3. The Empire of the Spirit by Michael Haykin. (This book has not been released yet.)

Dr. Haykin gave two excellent talks this morning. The first was on the deity and personality of the Holy Spirit. The second talk was from II Timothy on the Spirit as the source for the Christian life. I would try and summarize them, but it would be much better to listen to them yourself. Having had no formal teaching on the trinity, although I believed in it, these messages were very helpful. It also encouraged me to know the active place the Holy Spirit has in making Christ's work a reality in the life of the believer. He will speak twice tomorrow morning on "The Spirit of Prayer" and "The Fruit of the Spirit is Love." I hope Dr. Haykin will give some book recommendations on the Holy Spirit and the trinity. (I still have a book buying moratorium, but I can always add these to my list.) The audio for these talks will be available at the Grace Baptist site .

Dr. Haykin's flight was cancelled this morning, so he will not be arriving until late tonight. Instead, Pastor Ryan shared several scriptures that show different aspects of the work of the Holy Spirit from creation through Revelation, thus showing why we need to understand who He is and His work. He quoted from this sermon by C.H. Spurgeon: [M]y Brethren, our faith stands not in the wisdom of man nor in the eloquence of human lips, but in the power of God, then in vain do we make a profession unless the Holy Spirit dwells in our inner man. So dependent is the Christian Church upon the Holy Spirit, that there never was an acceptable sigh heaved by a penitent apart from Him. Never did a holy song mount to Heaven except He gave it wings! Never was there true prayer or faithful ministry except through the power and might of the Holy Spirit! Sinners are never saved apart from the Spirit of God. No moral persuasion, no force of example, no pretence of logic, no might of rhetoric ever...

The painful and inexplicable dispensations, which at the present moment may be thickening and deepening around your path, are but so many mysteries in God’s government, which He is working out to their certain, satisfactory, and happy results. And when the good thus embosomed in the lowering cloud of some crushing providence, accomplishes its benevolent and heaven-sent mission, then trial will expand its dark pinions and fly away—and sorrow will roll up its somber drapery and disappear! All things under the government of an infinitely great, all-wise, righteous, and beneficent Lord God, work together for good. What that good may be—the shape it may assume—the complexion it may wear—the end to which it may be subservient—we cannot tell. To our dim view it may appear an evil, but to God’s far seeing eye it is a positive good. Oh, truth most divine! Oh, words most consolatory! How many whose eye traces this page, it may be whose tears bedew it, whose sighs breathe over it, whose prayers h...

I am thankful for: Adrenalin. It has kept me going this past week. I should be much more tired than I am. A contract on our house. A possible contract on another house close to the church. The fun of pet sitting. This isn't Gracie but it looks like her. The theology conference starting tomorrow with Dr. Michael Haykin. The topic is The Holy Spirit in Reformed History . Prayer. I am learning to not stew over things in my mind with just me, myself, and I, but to pray, pray, and then pray. Not out of fear or thinking I can change God's mind, but acknowledging my dependence and trust on Him.

Our church has been reaching out to families in need in the community. On April 7th we will be serving dinner to these families and having a service afterwards to share the Gospel. This post by Frank Turk at TeamPyro is very thought provoking. Read the comments, too.

We have a contract. Now the fun begins. The closing is set for the end of April which doesn't give us much time. Today we found a house that looks promising not very far from the church. We are also looking at another part of the peninsula tomorrow. I am grateful for the prayers of the saints, specifically prayers that I will not panic. There are so many details to be worked out that it would be easy to get overwhelmed. The offers of practical help have also moved me to tears and thanks for the body of Christ. And yet our God is more real and faithful than even the best, most trustworthy person. It was such a timely reminder in Sunday's sermon that He is the one to whom we cry. Not as a spoiled prosperity gospel brat, but as a child adopted by grace in dependence and trust. So I may be dropping out of the blogsphere over the next month or so. It's exciting and scary at the same time, but we will wait expectantly for where God will lead us.

Star magnolia

I have been in a bit of a tizzy today. God willing, we may have a signed contract on our house by the end of the week-end. Yesterday evening an agent showed the house. We were going to small group anyway, so the timing worked out. There was plenty of time to clean the house and stage it for showing. I even tidied the flower bed by the driveway. It was pitiful looking. I don't like cannas, and they look like seaweed after the stalks have been left to decay all winter. Not the sight you want greeting potential buyers - "Ooh look at the lovely dead vegetation!" We were gone all evening and thought nothing of the showing. This morning my realtor emailed and asked if my daughter and I were inconvenienced by being kept from home since the potential buyers and their realtor were here for over 2 hours . (I take this as the hand of Providence. It was no coincidence that we were gone all evening, so they could take as long as they liked looking at the house.) They submitted a cont...

We were discussing Acts 14 in our small group last night. We see Paul and Barnabas fearlessly preaching the gospel. Their enemies are poisoning the minds of the people against them, and they remain in the face of opposition. One minute, people want to sacrifice to them as gods and the next minute, Paul is stoned and left for dead. How do we as 21st American Christians apply this? At the moment, we are not being threatened with stoning, but should that make us complacent? Right now, I am called to me a mom. Should I view that as a lesser calling since I am not on the front lines preaching the gospel? Paul held his life as cheap for the sake of the gospel. Will I be able to do likewise? Will I be able to count all things as loss? Do I see Christ as gain? These gems from the past were very timely: True Christians must make up their minds to trouble in this world. Whether we are ministers or hearers, whether we teach or are taught, it makes little difference. We must carry “a cross.” We mu...

I am thankful for: Warmer weather. Daylight savings is also an added bonus although I could have used the extra hour last Saturday night. It's nice to have the sun streaming in the windows after 6 pm. I hope to get out in the yard and tidy things a bit today. Little furry faces. The guinea pig seems to be feeling better. Rusty's input and output are more normal, which is a relief. Lizzy seems to be very content with her new digs with an unexpected improvement in her "territorialness". She is acting much more affectionate which is a nice change. Big Bun has also been extra-snuggly lately. I think he misses his human when we are downstairs during the day. Every evening at salad time, Big Bun literally runs circles around my feet and makes affectionate little honking sounds. He has been wanting more cuddle time before he gets tucked in at night. The Providence of God. I picked up John Flavel's The Mystery of Providence again. I first read the book in February 2008,...

In nothing does Providence shine forth more gloriously in this world than in ordering the occasions, instruments and means of conversion of the people of God. However skilfully its hand had moulded your bodies, however tenderly it had preserved them and however bountifully it had provided for them; if it had not also ordered some means or other for your conversion, all the former favours and benefits it had done for you had meant little. This, O this, is the most excellent benefit you ever received from its hand. You are more indebted to it for this, than for all your other mercies. The Mystery of Providence ~ John Flavel, Banner of Truth, page 60.

Due observation of Providence will both beget and secure inward tranquillity in your minds, amidst the vicissitudes and revolutions of things in this unstable vain world. "I will lay me down in peace, and sleep; for thou Lord only makest me dwell in safety" (Psalm 4:8). He resolves the sinful fear of events shall not rob him of his inward quiet, nor torture his thoughts with anxious forebodings. He will commit all his concerns into that faithful fatherly hand that had hitherto wrought all things for him, and he does not mean to lose the comfort of one night's rest, nor bring the evil of tomorrow upon today, but knowing in whose hand he was, wisely enjoys the sweet felicity of a resigned will. The Mystery of Providence ~ John Flavel, Banner of Truth, page 167.

Have you ever had one of those "Aha!" moments when God's truth is suddenly illuminated by the Holy Spirit? I had one of those moments last night. I was struggling these last few weeks with the topic of the next Titus 2 meeting, loving your husband. Given my situation, I didn't know if I should even go, because I didn't think I would have anything to offer. Another very real part was self pity. It still hurts at times, and it would be very tempting to stay at home and lick my wounds. But deep down I know that I need to be there. So to wrestle this out with the Lord, I began to listen to John Piper's series on marriage . I started on the ones on divorce but then went back to the beginning of the series. He gives a very different view of marriage from anything that I had ever been taught. He defines marriage as not mainly about staying in love but displaying the covenant keeping love of Christ and the church. That is why marriage is only for this life, because in...

These are mini-daffodils, about 5 inches tall, still wet from last night's rain.

In the Titus 2 women's group, the next chapter we will discuss is on loving one's husband. This is obviously a difficult topic for me and reading the chapter has reopened some wounds. God has given incredible grace, but there is still more healing that needs to be done. Therefore, I started listening to John Piper's series on Marriage, Christ, and Covenant: One Flesh for the Glory of God . I plan to listen to the whole thing, but I immediately jumped to the last two messages on divorce, because I need a Biblical/eternal perspective on what has happened in my life. I am learning that if I am having a problem with something, the root is theological more often than not. This Momentary Marriage by Piper and Chris Brauns' Unpacking Forgiveness should be arriving soon. I think these will also help me as I wrestle through this with the Lord. It may seem counter intuitive, but I believe that a right Biblical view of marriage will help bring healing. I certainly agree with Pip...

I don't want my children to be happy. ht: Challies

I am thankful for an unexpected extension for my course. I had signed up in April 2009 but had to cancel due to legal issues. I signed up again in October and found out, to my surprise, that the course time was cut in half from 12 to 6 months. Some of the assignments were optional, but it has been a challenge to get everything done. My deadline in April was fast approaching. I had the phone in hand to call the school about purchasing an extension, when I received an email from the director of education stating that the program was being extended to 9 months, and all students would receive an automatic free 3-month extension. Hallelujah! A huge weight was lifted. God willing, I should be able to complete everything within the next 4 months. This is another example of the Lord's kindness and mercy. He is able to do exceedingly above and beyond what we can ask or think.

It was so hard to avoid looking at the waves recently. Sure enough, I began to sink as soon as I did. This quote from Spiritual Depression was a lifeline today: [Y]ou and I can never doubt while we look at Him and are clear about Him. Without Him we are utterly hopeless. It does not matter how long you have been in the Christian life, you are dependent on Him for every step. Without Him we can do nothing. We can only conquer our doubts by looking steadily at Him and by not looking at them. The way to answer them is to look at Him. The more you know Him and His glory the more ridiculous they will become. So keep steadily looking at Him. Spiritual Depression ~ D. Martyn Lloyd-Jones, Eerdmans, page 158. (emphasis mine)

J.C. Ryle Quotes is having a giveaway of Meet the Puritans . More info here .

In our study of Philippians, our teacher asked us to consider the following verse: For me to live is Christ, and to die is gain. Philippians 1:21 If we are completely honest, how would we fill in the verse? For me to live is ______________, and to die is ________________. I know what the answer should be . I know what I want it to be , but it is not always the case. I pray that what should be will become reality in my life.

Today, the pastor, our deacon, and two couples from our small group helped us rearrange almost our entire house. They moved furniture, reorganized rooms, fixed chairs, re-plastered ceiling cracks, took down doors, put up a screen door, reorganized shelves, and then some. We are exhausted, but it is a good kind of exhaustion. There was absolutely no way we could have done it on our own. So many thanks to Ryan, Ron, Ryan, Becky, John, and Nicolette for their labor of love. We appreciate you so much and may the Lord bless you! Here are some of the results of the great furniture shuffle. I think they did a great job! (Warning: If your squeamish about mice, don't read on. When the piano was moved, we discovered a large quantity of split peas behind it. The peas were tucked in a comforter that was stuffed behind the piano to absorb some of the sound because of the plaster walls. There was no sign of a mouse nest, just the peas. Over a year ago we had a problem with mice in our pantry...

An all sci-fi edition: Extermiknit!

I am thankful for a very mild cold. Given that I have been burning the candle at both ends for months, I am grateful to the Lord for keeping my health. I am thankful for getting 100 on my cardiopulmonary test this week. This was a very difficult unit, so I was surprised by the score. I am thankful for Christian music with doctrinally sound lyrics. I appreciate songs that aren't afraid to mention the name of Jesus or God, songs that could never be misconstrued as singing about a significant other. I appreciate songs that express theology and Scripture not just spiritually vague phrases. We just got Sons and Daughters from Sovereign Grace in the mail yesterday. I have been enjoying the CD very much. One of the songs is available for free download here . I am grateful that I am accepted by God in Christ. There are times that I drift back into legalism and moralism, thinking that there is still something that I must do to earn God's favor. This statement from my pastor was a good ...

The Scripture is a mirror to show us our sins; Christ's blood is a fountain to wash them away. The Body of Divinity ~ Thomas Watson ht: gracegems

and had room for more bunnies...

Sometimes you need a little levity...

We attended the Titus 2 women's ministry this evening. We are coming together to learn how to live as women for the sake of the gospel so that the word of God may not be reviled. Some are married, some single, some divorced. Some with children, some without. Older and younger. Different trials and different struggles, but together in Christ. I have not always had the clearest view of womanhood. I had my feminist phase. I also had my pie-in-the-sky Christian fairy tale view of marriage and family. Neither was right. Given life's circumstances, I have the potential to drift into cynicism if I'm not careful. Therefore, I'm grateful for this opportunity where we can walk side by side and point one another to the Word. I need these women in my life. Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good, and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working a...